Love and Classical Dating...
With Johannes-Sebastian it was not an easy story.
We met at church when I was three years old.
I was excited to hear him every sunday,
as the organist would always end the mass with the
Toccata in D minor.
I started playing the piano thinking that one day,
I could play that piece too.
But then came Ludwig, he first touched me in the moonlight;
life with him became an Ode to Joy
even in the most pathetic times.
After a few years on, I met J.S. again -
I had started playing cello,
he seduced me back "tout de Suites"
(excuse my French).
It did not last long,
probably because I was too young to be able to get into
a serious relationship.
I was surrounded by many romantic men from all around the world
and wanted to enjoy their company: Robert, Johannes, Fryderyk , Camille, Anton, Felix, Piotr llitch among others...
I had a long story with Robert.
Every night I would listen to him until I fell asleep,
like one of those typical Scenes from Childhood
Later, he made me very emotional with the cello concerto.
Robert introduced me to Franz that very same year,
during a Winter Journey
. He led me to face death, and the maiden that I was, got touched in the heart.
My relationship with Franz was one of those pathological
relationships. I was spending my nights with him, he would make
me sad and then happy enough to cry
those beautiful tears that make you feel extremely alive.
J.S. would always come back from time to time,
he was like my impossible love.
Every time, I would hope that I was ready for him.
Our reunions where always happy ones, followed by vast frustration and
then he would disappear again until our next meeting.
Meanwhile, I would go back to Gasper, or have an intense dialogo
with Gyögyi always followed by a crazy cappriocio.
No matter what, J.S. was always in my thoughts,
somehow I felt that we were connected.
One day, I realized that all those men had something in common.
They all knew and came "after" J.S.
They were all connected to him.
When I realized that, I moved to Germany - I needed to get closer to
J.S. again and to try something new.
I needed to be in his land. I needed answers to understand why it didn't work out between us until now.
I went wayyy back in time. To baroque times my dear,
it took me a LOT of guts to find you...I got lost many times, and soon realized that we are not
lost as long as we don't give up trying to find our way out.
I had to meet Anna Magdalena, your love.
Something told me that she would be the one who would bring you back. She did.
I had finally found the answer that I was looking for.
I found my answer! I am now spending my days with J.S.
with a little help from Anna. A kind of "Ménage à trois"
with the Bachs. (What we do for love... )
Last december, I went to Leipzig to visit J.S. in his last home.
I had those "Franz tears", I was crying with mixed emotions,
it was the first time I felt so close to him.
J.S., I know you won't mind if I use Ludwig's kind words...
Marianne Dumas is a french cellist and teacher currently based in Berlin, where she is busy recording her upcoming Bach CD (what else;)).
You can follow her journey and keep up with her musical adventures on her HELLO STAGE page!